Episode 10 - Being Normal
by SnowWhiteandDopey
Summary: Jaime wants out of the OSI but the NSB won't let her. Oscar comes up with a drastic plan but wants Jaime to think about it carefully. To help her, he sends Jaime to talk to the second bionic man, Barney Hiller. What will Jaime do?


Oscar was in his office working on an upcoming conference where he and Bill Parr would be making a presentation to Congress. The presentation would be a joint effort. Oscar was not excited at sharing time with Bill. It was another attempt by the Secretary to create a positive atmosphere between the two departments.

His musing was interrupted by the appearance of Rudy Wells. "Hi Oscar, how about some lunch?"

"That would be welcome."

As they got lunch at the local deli, Oscar inquired, "So how was Colorado?"

"Great. I worked on some new circuits for Steve and Jaime. Barney came in for a check up. He invited me to a race then made arrangements for me to watch practice from the pits. It was really interesting how they put those cars together. I sat with Mary in the stands. I'm glad I had ear plugs."

For a minute Oscar didn't know who Rudy was talking about. When he started talking about the race track, Oscar remembered. It immediately hit him. _What about Jaime? That's an idea._

Jaime walked into the living room to find Oscar staring at the empty fireplace. What Jaime didn't yet know was that Oscar had been staring out into space since his lunch with Rudy. She sat down next to him. "What is it Oscar?" She was almost afraid to ask as he was so deep in thought and he looked…she couldn't put a label on it but it didn't look good.

"Jaime," Oscar started tentatively, "there's something I want to discuss with you. I want you to think about it carefully…think about all the ramifications." Oscar was well aware of Jaime's habit of leaping before she looked.

Jaime was becoming concerned by his serious tone. "Okay."

"Have you ever heard of…Barney Hiller?"

"No." Jaime slowly replied then it hit her, "Wait. There's a racing guy by that name."

"Yes, you're right. About 2 years before your accident, we were looking for a likely second candidate for bionic replacement surgery. Barney had a terrible crash. He was young, smart and a risk taker. We decided he would…be good for the OSI."

Jaime was stunned. She had no idea that there was another bionic person. No one, not Oscar, Rudy or Steve had mentioned this man. She'd worked in the OSI for 4 years but had never worked with him. "What happened? How come I've not heard of this before? What…"

Oscar stood up, walked to the fireplace then replied, "Barney was given bionic limbs and trained as an agent. Unlike you and Steve, Barney couldn't…deal with it, emotionally. He sort of…well, I guess you could say he felt…he couldn't be beaten. He was too cocky about it all. He would get into bar fights just so he could fight a rival. The missions he went on…he was irresponsible and took unacceptable risks that put himself and others in unnecessary danger. Then he decided to sell himself to the highest bidder as sort of a super mercenary. Steve had to go after him, it wasn't easy but it was done. After evaluations were completed, it was deemed…necessary to…fire him as an agent. There was talk of removing his bionic limbs but I decided that would be cruel. Rudy tuned his arms and legs down to "normal" strength although knowing Barney he made it so he's a little stronger than he was before. We had counseling for him and watched him for months after he was released to see how he did. Barney went back to driving and that was the end of it. I actually had forgotten about him until yesterday when Rudy told me he'd given Barney a checkup in Colorado."

Oscar sat on the couch next to Jaime before he started talking again. "Jaime, I know how much you want out of the OSI. It would be remiss of me not to put this option out on the table…although I have reservations about trying it."

"What are you suggesting?" Jaime could see his reluctance but her mind was racing. Was this an option? Why on earth hadn't he thought of it before? It was so simple, especially if Oscar had arranged it.

"If you decide to, we could…have your bionics turned down…for some medical reason but only if we had assurances from the NSB that you would not be sent to their zoo. Wait a minute." Oscar saw by the look on her face that she was about to go off on some wild tangent. "LISTEN and consider what I have to say. Jaime, please."

Jaime was having trouble focusing but he waited until she was calm and in control. "Let's hear it."

With a deep breath, Oscar continued. "Barney's case was different. He was an agent for a couple of months. He didn't develop enemies. Jaime, you've lived with extra strength for 4 years. You have to consider the ramifications of losing that…edge. I'm concerned about…the danger to you from enemies that might want to take you for…" Oscar hated to even think about it but she had to consider it, "research. If someone came after you, you wouldn't be able to defend yourself. Also, there is the risk that the NSB would see you as MORE dangerous on your own without extra strength than with it."

Jaime sat there blinking at him. "That's all…a lot at once. It has appeal. I mean, it would be like not being bionic…anymore."

There was something that Oscar had to express. It was something he had noticed since they had been living together. "Jaime, I, uh, have to ask this. Does part of the reason you want out of the OSI…have to do with…being bionic?"

Jaime felt like he'd seen through her like no one else had. She wanted to be normal, to FEEL normal. There had always been a little part of her that resented the limbs that weren't hers. He was looking at her with his big brown, puppy dog eyes. Jaime could only reply "Yeah," as tears were starting to flow.

"I've noticed how you speak of yourself and your bionics like they were separate. I don't know…maybe…Jaime. Jaime, in my eyes you're Jaime, from the top of your head down to the bottom of your feet." Oscar took her hand then kissed it, "This is YOUR arm. When…when we were on the ship and I saw you in your bikini the first time," he gave her a big grin as he continued, "I saw a beautiful, sexy woman. I, uh, I love your legs. To me they are YOUR legs. I don't think 'Wow, Rudy did a great job making those legs'. I think 'Wow, she's got great legs!' Babe, you had a terrible accident and were given replacement limbs. Lots of people have experienced the same situation but their replacement limbs are not as…advanced as yours. Someday my hope is that everyone who loses a limb will have the opportunity to have replacements as realistic as yours."

Oscar was confronted by a suddenly sobbing Jaime who launched herself in his arms. "Sometimes, sometimes I don't feel normal. I, I don't know. I guess it's like survivor's guilt. Why me? I didn't ask for the bionics and I resent them sometimes but…I also feel so lucky. I understand what life would be like without them. Then there's the superhuman strength. I've always felt I needed to give back for receiving them but it isn't a life that I would choose otherwise. I don't want to be a robot or superwoman, I want to be Jaime." Jaime was clinging to him then pulled back to look in his eyes, "Even…during missions, you've always treated me as Jaime, not a tool or a robot but as me. I love you for so many reasons but that's a big one."

"Before you decide anything, I want you to talk to Barney. I'll have Rudy set something up. He and Barney are friendly - I think Barney will agree to see you."

The next morning Oscar went to see Rudy to have him arrange a meeting between Jaime and Barney. He had felt Jaime's muted excitement all evening. He supported her in whatever she decided but he wanted her to have all the facts first.

"Oscar, are you crazy! Jaime can't do that. The NSB will never allow it AND what about her safety? She'll be a sitting duck for any foreign power that wants to grab her."

Oscar started to open his mouth to respond but Rudy was on a roll, "Have you forgotten about Lane? He could easily get you or Jaime without her bionics. What about later on? Jaime's always talked about having kids. What about their safety, ESPECIALLY when their father is the director of the OSI?"

"Listen, Rudy, the OSI and the life we lead…it has to stop. Jaime desperately wants out AND I want her out. I'll do everything in my power to get her out. Then I'm leaving too as soon as I possibly can. I've considered all the ramifications of Jaime losing her strength and I've expressed my reservations to her. It is important that she consider all options. I want Jaime to talk to Hiller so she can have all the facts."

Rudy frowned but nodded his head. "Okay, I'll call Barney." Rudy emphatically continued, "I still don't like it. I'm going with Jaime to see Barney - partly to introduce them and partly to talk some sense into her."

Rudy was still fuming when he returned to his office but he would do anything for Jaime. "Hi Barney."

"It's been a long time Rudy. What's up?"

"Barney, I'd like to ask you a favor. I'd like to come out this weekend with…Jaime Sommers. She has the same…condition as you. Jaime wants to discuss how you live a normal life with that condition."

Barney was dumbfounded. _Another bionic person?_ He'd not spoken to Steve Austin in four years or been associated with the OSI in that time except for his visits to Rudy. "I, uh, don't know."

"Barney, as a favor to me. She really wants out and Oscar sees this as an option."

With a frown, Barney replied "Okay Rudy, as a favor to you."

Friday afternoon Rudy Wells and Jaime Sommers boarded a plane for Phoenix. Barney Hiller was racing at Firebird Raceway over the weekend. It took all of the restraint that Rudy could muster not to confront Jaime with her plans. They spent time talking about Jaime's classes and the wedding plans.

"When are Helen and Jim flying in?" Rudy asked.

"Next Friday. She and Callahan are hosting the bridal shower Saturday afternoon. With Callahan, it should be lively." Jaime chuckled.

"So where's the honeymoon going to be?"

"Cancun. You know how I love the sunshine and the beach. We'll be there for a week over spring break. The only thing that concerns me is the crowds. I've booked a bungalow that's right on the beach. It should be heaven."

Rudy was chuckling to himself. He just never thought she would be talking about her honeymoon as Mrs. Oscar Goldman. Rudy was happy for them but it still seemed a little surreal. "I'm sure it will be wonderful. Oscar is looking forward to the wedding."

"And the honeymoon." Jaime added with a giggle.

Rudy laughed, "Yes, I'm sure of that too."

After landing Rudy and Jaime drove to the racetrack. Jaime was a little nervous but she didn't know why. Rudy led her to a tall, light brown haired man. "Hi Barney."

"Hi Rudy, welcome to summer!" Barney teased as he wiped his hands then shook Rudy's hand.

"Barney, I'd like you to meet Jaime Sommers. Jaime, Barney Hiller."

Barney smiled a big smile but his eyebrows were furrowed as he took in the tall, blond woman. "Nice to meet you Jaime," Barney shook her hand.

"And you Barney. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me. I appreciate it."

"Well, Jaime, I was curious about meeting a bionic woman and I'm always happy to help my favorite doctor." Barney teasingly told Jaime while looking at Rudy with a grin.

"The feeling is mutual. I had no idea about you either."

The three of them found a picnic area away from the pits but in the shade. "So, Jaime, tell me about yourself. I remember you from the tennis circuit years back. How does a tennis pro become bionic? I can't imagine Billie Jean's serve being the reason or  
maybe you crossed Bobby Riggs." Barney curled his face up into a grin and chuckle.

"It was pretty fierce but no, not Billie Jean and definitely not Bobby." Jaime proceeded to tell Barney her whole story from her engagement to Steve to her run in with the NSB. "So they wouldn't let me go. I love visiting the zoo but I wouldn't want to live in one. Since that time I've done a few missions but I still want out. Oscar has been trying to come up with something that would allow me freedom from the government. After Rudy's visit with you last week, Oscar suggested I meet you."

Barney was trying to process all the information that hit him at once. "That's quite a tale there Jaime. I see you have a ring. Who's the lucky guy? I take it it's not Steve?"

_I wonder how he'll take this._ "I'm engaged to…Oscar. We're getting married in three weeks."

Barney's eyebrows went up in surprise. Instead of the possibly negative reaction that Jaime feared, Barney made light of the situation. "Jaime, you must be a special lady indeed to get Oscar Goldman out of his office, unless of course you used your bionics as…persuasion."

A relieved Jaime smiled, "I think most wives and girlfriends have to resort to a little 'arm twisting' now and again with their dedicated men."

Barney laughed, "I guess that's true enough. Well, congratulations to you and Oscar. Jaime, it sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders. After being on both sides of the fence, I'm not sure…having the reduction would make you happy."

Jaime was taken aback by the sudden shift in conversation. "Why, uh, would you…why is that?"

"You want out of the OSI and this is a means of doing that but you've lived a certain way for four – five years. Jaime, it isn't easy. How many times today have you used bionics? Yesterday? If you'll think back, I bet you used them a lot." Barney let Jaime think a little before he continued. "It didn't take me long to get used to using them for everyday things and I just had the strength for less than a year. I relied on them many times in my daily life. I bet you do tasks all day using your bionics and you don't realize it. It will be a long period of adjustment mentally and physically."

Rudy was jumping for joy inside. This is exactly what he'd hoped for. It was time for his medical opinion. "The physical adjustments may go on for awhile. You may not remember how we had to tinker with your arm because of balance. Your right arm is much heavier than your left. You would have to keep some extra strength to compensate. And I estimate at least a month of physical therapy."

"You've been an agent for years. I'm guessing you and Oscar have accumulated…well, let's call them enemies. I seem to remember Steve telling me about kidnap attempts and shootings. I don't know, but for me, having bionics would be a good thing." Barney sat down on a picnic table then looked at Jaime expecting some sort of comment.

Jaime started sputtering, which she did when nervous and buying time. "I wanna be a wife, not a bodyguard." After a deep breath, Jaime continued, "You've given me a lot to think about. Thanks for being so open."

"That was the whole idea. Hey, why don't the two of you stick around? I've got to do a qualifying lap then I'll be outta here. Let's have dinner, what do ya say?"

Rudy glanced at the distracted Jaime then replied, "Barney, we'd love to have dinner but first I want to get checked in to our hotel. How about you meet us there?" Rudy then escorted Jaime to the car. It was a quiet ride to the hotel as Jaime pondered on what Barney had said. Rudy just sat back and let her think. _At least she's THINKING instead of just doing._

It was a spirited dinner with Barney and his wife. Rudy enjoyed seeing them so happy. Barney had transformed over the years from the out of control OSI agent to a calm, assertive racing driver. He looked at Jaime who was doing her best to keep up with the conversation and join in. He wished her the peace of mind that Barney now had. _If it wasn't for Lane and all the others like him, I would love to help with the operation. I've got to advise what is best for Jaime and Oscar. Even if Oscar leaves the OSI, Lane will still come after him and possibly his family. _

As Jaime and Rudy were returning to the hotel, Rudy knew it was time. "Jaime, now that you've talked to Barney, have you made any conclusions?"

Jaime was thoughtful for a moment. "Not really. I mean, it's a big step. On the one hand I want out of missions and I want to FEEL normal, as normal as I can. On the other hand, am I being selfish? I can see where for the safety of my family my bionics can be useful. I keep…having…these dreams, nightmares really. In them Oscar is in great danger and I try to help him but can't. I don't want to be his bodyguard, I wanna be his wife. But…I can't stand the idea that in a crisis I would have to sit back and wait."

Rudy gave Jaime a look acknowledging the fact that she isn't one for waiting.

"I know, I know. That's not really my strong suit. You know, you've not given your opinion on all this."

"I wanted you to gather information before I got started. Well, as your doctor, the procedure would involve cutting the skin of both your legs and your arm. We would make the adjustments then have you use the limbs to test the limits. We will continue adjusting until we get to an acceptable range of normal. We would then have to graft the skin back. It won't look as natural as before in those spots but we'll do the best we can. You would then have a rehab to learn how to function with the reduction. It will almost be like starting over. There would be a chance that we would have to go in again to make adjustments. IF you decide on this course, because of your schedule, we wouldn't do it until your summer break."

Rudy let this all sink in before he took a deep breath and continued. "As your friend, I understand that you do not want to be Oscar's bodyguard but both of you have enemies. Whether you both leave the OSI, you may remain targets. It might be a longer time than you both would like before Oscar is released from the OSI. And what about your children? You currently have the capability to make some difference in keeping yourself and your family safe. I know you Jaime, you are not one to stand back and wait for help to arrive. For the last four years you've taken matters into your own hands. Remember how you reacted and what you did when Franklin kidnapped Oscar? Imagine going through that again but without your bionics. Whether you have superhuman strength or not, you'll still be bionic. Just so you can carry the extra weight of the limbs, you will have additional strength. You won't be able to run sixty mph but you'll still be able to run faster than the average woman."

Jaime's eyebrows furrowed as she contemplated her situation. _Personal wants vs responsibility. _ "I don't know Rudy. I don't know what to do."

Rudy took Jaime in a hug, "I know honey, I know. I want you to be happy and safe. You know my concerns but I will support your decision whatever it is. I have an idea. Why don't you make a conscious effort not to use your bionic strength for a month just to see how you do."

It was the next afternoon before Jaime arrived home. She and Rudy had not discussed Jaime's bionics after their ride back to the hotel the night before but Jaime had spent time thinking about it. Once again she had been awoken by the recurring nightmare of Oscar needing to be rescued but Jaime not being able to help him. Jaime cried when she woke up as the dream was so vivid.

Oscar was in the kitchen when she walked in. He was practicing his part of the presentation he and Bill Parr were to give. "You know Max, you're right. This has got to be the most boring presentation ever." Out of the corner of his eye, Oscar saw Jaime coming towards him. "Babe, you're home, I didn't hear you." Oscar and Jaime threw their arms around each other for a hug and kiss.

When he tried to pull away, she held him tighter, "Please, hold me."

Oscar was a little concerned but did as she requested. "It's okay." He held her until she broke away to greet Max.

"Have you eaten? I can get you something?" Oscar suggested. He really wanted to know what had happened with Hiller but only in Jaime's time.

"Yes, Rudy and I had lunch. Oscar, I'm still not…sure but I think…I want the…procedure."

"Okay but if…you're not sure…" Oscar's face had drained of color and his heart stopped for just a few seconds as he responded.

"Rudy suggested I do my best not to use my bionics for a month to see how I do. Oscar, tell me, am I…is this selfish of me?" Jaime relied on Oscar's honesty but she was afraid to hear what he said.

Oscar was thoughtful for a moment. "No, not in a negative way. You know what's best for you. You have to take care of yourself. I know you've thought long and hard about this and have considered all the ramifications, good and bad. Jaime, I support and respect your decision." There was a pause in their conversation as they searched each other's eyes. Oscar slowly asked, "Do you want me to start negotiating with Parr and the Secretary now or…later?"

Jaime took his hands and shyly gazed into his eyes. "When you think it's a good time but soon. Rudy suggested we could do the procedure over the summer break."

Oscar nodded. "Okay." With misty eyes, Oscar added, "Hey, I love you."

Jaime tearfully replied with a hug, "I love you." As she held him memories of her dreams caused her to hold him even tighter.


End file.
